Forbidden In Life
by LaZ Chaos
Summary: What if, during the end of the war, Shani lives! This is my story for him. He never gets enough love...Please read about the homicidle, musicloving druggie! Rated T for Shani's language. Chapter 8 is up!
1. Intro! Surviving!

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

**_Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49._**

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**Chapter 1 – Intro…Surviving!**

"Die!" the pilot screams through the fighting communicator. The Duel, I think, flies in to attack me for attacking the red-ish, pink gundam. I thought they were on opposite sides! What on Earth…I mean…in the Universe is going on? I attempt to maneuver the Forbidden further away from the two machines. "I'm not going to let you get away!"

"Erg…would you just die already!" I holler through the communicator. I try to get a strong blast through, but another mobile suit, the Buster, attacks, damaging my already damaged MS. "Damn it! Gang up on me, will you?" I mutter. I attack the Duel again, this time with more power. My laser beam connects harshly with his shield. The next thing I know, the shield explodes and his laser sword comes straight toward my cock-pit. "Ahh!" The sound escapes my throat before I can do anything to stop it. Quickly, I open the escape hatch and grab my prized possession, an old-fashioned I-pod with just as old music on it, if not older, before slipping out of it. The blast from my now-destroyed MS sends me flying backwards and out of the 3 Mobile Suits' sight.

I watch, horrified, as the red machine I hate cuts through the Calamity. "Orga?" I murmur. My hand brushes the helmet that is keeping me alive as I try to cover my eyes. "Gods…no…" I force my frail body to move over to my comrade's MS. Surprisingly, it hasn't blown up as of yet. "Orga?" I mutter again. I nearly jump out of my skin as my hand settles on the metal of the MS. I move over slightly so I can reach the Emergency hatch's handle. I nearly pass out from the sight inside. Orga's body was cut in half. Wherever his body is cut clean through is charred flesh, muscle, clothing and even some charred bone. "No…"

I force myself to move inside of the cock-pit, careful not to brush any part of the corpse of my friend. My hands reach for the communication. Fortunately, the MS is in good enough shape that I am able to open a private line to Crot. "Crot!" I cry into the communicator. "Are you there?"

Some static overtakes the communicator, the only evidence of how badly beat up this machine is. "Shan (BZT) that you? (BZT) I thought you were (BZT) IA! How'd you (BZT) vive?" I can barely make out what he was trying to say.

"Escaped before it blew up," I reply into it calmly. "Orga's dead. I'm in Calamity right now. It's completely out of commission except for communication. And even that is frazzled." I glance back over at Orga and shudder. "What are we going to do? I just saw the Dominion blow up…"

The static was the only sound I heard for a short moment. "I don't (BZT) about you, but I'm still fight(BZT). Hopefully, I (BZT) die in the process. (BZT) out the Gamma Glipheptin we're not (BZT) to live for much long(BZT). Sorry."

My mind goes blank as I take in his words. "W-what? You're going to kill yourself by racing rashly into combat?" I ask incredulously. "But…you can't! You can't leave me all alone! CROT!" I cry. I shudder with non-falling tears as he cuts off the signal between us. Between my gasping breaths I can hear a faint zapping sound. "Shit! It's going to blow!" I dive out of the cock-pit just to get caught in another blast, this time the Calamity with Orga inside. "AHHH!" I scream. My eyes start getting heavy, almost closing as I lay in the middle of open Space with all the fighting surrounding me. "What's going…on…here?" I mumble before my eyes frift closed in unconsiousness. I passed out.

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**_Ok! Chapter one done and chapter two is already started! Shani LIVES! YAY!_**

**_Shani: Great...now what hell are you going to put me through?_**

**_Heh heh heh!_**

**_Shani: Uh-oh..._**

**_Crot: You killed me! ME! You bastard!_**

**_Orga: She's a bitch! And she killed me too, you idiot!_**

**_Crot: I LOVE to fight! Why would i not?_**

**_My story, my way!_**

**_Shani: Just give up, Crot-idiot._**

**_Crot: WAHHHH! T-T_**


	2. WHAT?

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

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**Chapter 2 – WHAT?**

"Who do you think he is?" a girl's soft voice murmurs. I am awake, but I can't seem to move…at all! A hand settles on my cheek causing me to try all I can do to through it off of me, but I can't even open my eyes let alone my hand.

A second voice, a boy's, answers her. "I'm not exactly sure, Lacus. But he is obviously from the Earth Forces judging his uniform." I recognize that voice it's the…the red machine's pilot!

I force my eyes open, ignoring the searing pain. "Y-you!" I gasp out weakly. I glare coldly at him. "All because of…you!" I snap to the blue-haired, green eyed boy, before glancing at the other person in the room. She, Lacus as the pilot called her, had grotesque pink hair, blue eyes and a sympathetic/surprised expression on her face. I turn back to face the pilot.

"Wait a minute! You're the pilot of the Forbidden! I can recognize that voice!" the boy splutters. He moves in-between me and Lacus. "So it's you? You're the guy who's tried to kill me and Kira all the time?" Kira? Must be the pilot of the first machine we were told to capture.

"No shit, Sherlock!" I drawl. I glance down at my arms. "The thing I wonder about is why I'm not in pain. The drug has wore off so I should be going through withdrawal or be dead," I comment. I glare back up at him.

Lacus steps out from behind the pilot. "Well…about that…" she murmurs gently. That doesn't sound good! "My doctor managed to cure you from it…but…you're a coordinator now…" she informs me sadly. "I'm sorry!"

"A…coordinator?" I blink and lay down on the soft bed again. That's it? I'm free from the drug and am now what I hate? What the hell do I do now? "W-what?" My gaze surveys the room before my eyes catch something. I lunge for it. "No!" My hand grips the sharp doctor scalpel tightly. "No!" I press it up against my neck, shuddering pitifully. "I can't be! No!" I press it harder against my soft skin of my neck, drawing blood.

The pilot moves toward me, but I fix my grip more firmly. Lacus puts her arm in front of the boy's chest. "No…stay here, Athrun. I'll handle it." Lacus walks toward me, ignoring my threat to kill myself. "Don't…" she coos.

"Don't come near me, filth!" I scream. My hand goes to jam it into my throat, but the girl grabs my hand before I could graze my neck any further. I smack her hand away and drop the knife. "Get away from me…" I warn. I rise shakily to my feet and back away from the two fiends. My back presses firmly against the wall as Lacus walks closer to me. "Leave me alone! Get away from me!"

"Calm down!" Lacus coos softly. She takes another long step toward me.

"G-go…a-a-away!" I whimper. She stops and stares sadly at me. "L-leave me a-alone!" My hands move in front of my shivering form in an insufficient attempt to protect myself. "Go away…" I simper. I fall to my knees in fear of the reality of the situation.

"What?" Athrun looks from my scared face to Lacus's sad one. "Why is he so scared?"

Lacus looks away from me and turns to him. "He's scared. He's been against all coordinators for so long and now he's been taken in by me and you, who use to be his enemy, and now found out he's a coordinator now," she explains. She walks over to my shivering form and sets her hand on my shoulder. I jolt and stare terrified up at her. "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise."

I glare up at her. "Ya right!" I spit out. I move away from her and find myself trapped between the wall and the pink-haired girl. "Leave me alone, bitch!" I snap. Lacus looks surprised and Athrun looks like he's going to attack me. "Leave me alone!" I shout. I cower against the wall, shuddering with uneven, fearful breaths. "Go away…" I burry my head into my knees, trying to get rid of them mentally. "Go away…"

"Shh…calm down…" She takes another step closer. Behind her, the pilot takes a step toward me.

My eyes widen in fear. "No! Stay away!" My voice is panicky sounding. I hurry over to Lacus, ignoring my fear of her, and hide behind her so that she's in-between me and the pilot. "N-no…" I'm able to hide fully behind her since I'm so thin and her dress was one of those puffy ones. "No!"

Lacus bends down and wraps her thin arms around my frail form. "Athrun…don't come over here. He's terrified of you…" she says softly, hugging me close. "I have to feel sorry for this boy…he's terrified." I close my eyes and rest slightly into her embrace. "What's your name?"

I look up with wide different colored eyes, though she could only see one of them, the purple one, since my long green hair covers the amber one. I have heterochromia (Simply means you have one eye one color and the other a different color) you see. "Sh-Shani Andres, ma'am." I stutter quietly.

"Just call me Lacus, Shani!" Her smile is blindingly bright and real, something I haven't seen before. Nobody would smile at me like that and nobody would smile like that anywhere near me. I…I don't know what to make of this pink-haired girl. Bu I definitely know what to make out of that pilot! He's my enemy still… "Are you ok now?" she asks, a sad tinge in her voice…pity?

I look up at her with confused eyes. "Why are you being nice to me? I tried to kill you and that jerk over their. And all your comrades. All on my own choice…I was only supposed to capture those two damned machines!" My head ducks down and I fear she's going to get mad at me.

To my surprise, she simply hugs me tighter. "Because…you need someone to be nice to you. You can't go living in this world being hated and harmed by everybody," she says quietly. She helps me up gently. "And I'm sorry if you don't like that you're a coordinator like I am, but we needed to do that or else that drug would kill you."

"Gamma Glipheptin…" I murmur. She gives me a confused look as she helps me over to the bed I was on just a little while ago. "The drug is called Gamma Glipheptin…" I mutter, keeping my head downcast. Why am I telling her this? She's a coordinator…the enemy! _You're a coordinator now, too, dumbass! _a part of me seems to say. I fall heavily on the bed when she lets go of me. What am I going to do now? I'm a criminal who ran from my sentence. Either I am to be with Azrael-Bastard or I'm supposed to be dead! What's going to happen to me?

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_**Ok! Done! And this isn't going to be a ShaniXLacus story unless you want it to be. Those who want Shani to stay single say so in a review and those who want Shani and Lacus to be together tell me in a review!**_


	3. Dreaming Of The Past

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

_**Unlike popular belief, Shani does care about his comrades. They were the closest people to friends that he ever had. Before the war, when he wasn't on the drugs, he was actually a (more or less…most likely less…definitely less likely) a normal boy.**_

_**Warning: Extreme violence near the end of the chapter. **_

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**Chapter 3 – Dreaming Of The Past**

(AN: 'Kay…this will seem like Shani likes Lacus, but he doesn't. He just admits she looks good.)

I stare up at the female coordinator who I had hid behind just a few moments ago. Her long pink hair is perfectly straight and goes all the way down to her small waist. Lacus has a good figure, at least better than Badgiruel's and that Fllay-brat. She is wearing a gown-like white and purple dress that went all the way to her ankles. The thing that attracts most (heh, heh, heh…SHANI'S A PERVERT! Shani: Shaddup!) is her face, though. Perfectly shaped, it gives her a look of a princess. She has pure eyes of blue that contrast pleasantly with her almost unnatural, beautiful pale skin and her flowing pink hair. Her rosy lips are turned upward in an angelic smile. That smile is directed straight at me.

My purple and hidden amber eyes turn to the man standing just a few feet behind her. His mid-neck length hair is a dark blue in color. His slightly tanned face held bright emerald eyes. Those eyes are currently shaped into a glare nowhere as harsh as the one claiming my own at the moment. He has on a t-shirt of green that sort of matches my own green hair. He also has on a pair of expensive-looking blue jeans. All in all…he looks like a jerk/idiot.

I then turn around to face the small room. It has the white blanketed bed that she forced me on, a dark brown dresser that my EA uniform blue jacket rest upon, a small closet that is pulled shut with the dark brown closet-door which also matches the room door perfectly. The walls are a light blue.

So here I am, clad only in the white military pants and my black tank-top, checking my surrounding s with flashing discolored eyes, though they can only see the purple one, and my thin lips twisted into a scowl. To say I am angry would be quite the understatement, but then how would you feel if you became what you despised most? And sorry, but I don't agree with the age old saying 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.'

Lacus walks over and sits beside me, much to the displeasure of the pilot. But hey, I couldn't care less! He can just kiss my ass! "Are you going to be ok?" the female coordinator questions gently, her blue eyes meeting my purple one.

"You think I'm ok?" I question harshly, pushing the small hand off of my shoulder coldly. 'Why does she think she knows me? It's obvious she doesn't so why does she pretend? Wait-a-minute…why do I even care?' I splutter silently. "Leave me alone…" I tell her, lying down on the white sheets. "Leave me alone…" I repeat. She turns her blue eyes to my close ones, I can feel her gaze. "GOD!" I snap, opening my eyes angrily. "Let. Me. Sleep." I punctuate each syllable hoping it will make it easier for her small, MINISCULE brain to understand. She starts and turns to the pilot, mouthing that they should go. I close my eyes again, at the sound of the both of them leaving the room. I fall asleep instantly.

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"Shani Andres!" The lady who called for me was none other than my 'dear' old mom. She had long blond hair, wavy like my own, and bright purple eyes. She was thing, and still pretty at 29 years of age. I was only 10 at the time. I walked in and spotted her wearing her favorite purple dress that matched perfectly with her eyes. She motioned for me to sit down in the chair across the small living room. I did and turned to my father.

My father was a stoic man; the perfect business man type. He had hard brown eyes and moss green, cropped hair. He always looked disgusted with my light green, shaggy, yet wavy hair that fell over both of my mismatched eyes. He hated how punk-ish I was, staring at my ripped jeans, loose sweater and the sliver chain I had bought a year ago. Anytime he heard my music, he chucks it out the CD out of the window. Now, he was glaring at me coldly. I knew before they even told me that I was kicked out of the house. I never even struggled as my father picked me up, sock-feet and grungy punk clothing in all, before throwing me roughly out the door. Just because I was a punk bad-ass! They were too goody-two shoes for me anyway!

I pulled myself angrily off the grass, turning only to glare and stick up my finger at the house, knowing full-well that they were peeking though the window 'discreetly'. I kicked the ground roughly with a socked foot before nonchalantly storming off down the street, pleased with the black aura I was emitting. I found an old, unused alleyway and plunked down, glad that I kept junk-food buried in the pockets of the slightly torn jean jacket. It would have been leather if I had enough cash.

That's how two street-punks found me five days later, digging my hand into a bag of chips I swiped from a corner store a week ago. One was a tall, dark, almost black, purpled haired 16 year old with dark black eyes wearing a tuff (cool, yet tough) leather jacket and black jeans. The other was a normal 15 year old. He had slightly greased back lime green hair, a bit on of a dirty blond color mixed in with it, and cold green eyes that pierced my face.

"Whaddaya want?" I growled, not caring that I was a foot shorter than the shorter of the two. The purple haired boy grinned at the other while I glared at the both of them.

"Found ourselves a little tiger!" he sniggered as the 15 year old smirked. They both turned to face me properly. "We wander alleyways, kid. Why are you here?" I don't answer the purple haired boy glaring down at me mockingly. "Ya homeless, kid?" He was taken aback when I nodded, glaring up at him coldly. He turned to the green-haired boy before stooping beside me. "Hmm…wouldn't have though that…" He offered his hand out to pull me up. When I grabbed it, he pulled my small form off of the much of the alleyway. "I'm Chris and he is Orga."

I blinked, surprised that the teenagers were being so nice to me. "I'm Shani Andres," I muttered out. "And so what if I got kicked to the curb? What's it to you anyway?" Chris laughed loudly.

Orga grinned down at me. "We are, too, kid!" I looked at him blankly. "There are two other homeless boys in our little 'gang'. You can join it…" he offered calmly. I looked down toward the spot I had sat down on in the muck before readily agreeing. Chris smiled at me before scooping me up into strong arms and off of my sore feet. The two walked, one carrying me effortlessly, to the small abandoned building that they claimed as their home. In there were the two boys Orga Sabnack had told me about.

"Oi! Crot! Mick!" Orga shouted out, walking through the door-less doorway. Chris, STILL carrying me, followed. He set me down gently onto a shabby sofa, laughing as a red-head boy and a blond boy wandered up curiously. Orga plunked down next to me wrapping an arm around my shoulders casually, sensing the wariness growing inside of me.

Soon, I found out the red-head is Crot Buer. He's 12 years old, retarded (in my opinion), had a weird swept-to-the-side hairstyle and blue eyes. He wore an orange t-shirt and black jeans. He also had a navy blue sweater wrapped around his waist as a temporary place to wear it while he's sweating. He was a humorous guy that I got along with almost instantly.

Mick, actually Michael Lawrence but hated the name, was the small blond boy who said he had just turned 11 one month ago, meaning he was not even a year older than me. But although he was young, he was far from innocent. Actually, all of us had seen hard times, but Mick more than the others. His hazel eyes were sharp for his young age. Mick wore black sweats and an almost even blacker sweatshirt. Although his tough looks say otherwise, Mick was a comical guy, as well. He had a wicked temper, but hardly lost it.

I soon found out that some of these guys were really dangerous. Chris was orphaned at birth. Chris wasn't even his real name, his adoptive parents called him Christian. The elderly couple, Luna and Matt Burner, took him in. When he was seven, they decided he was old enough to live on his own. Chris was an extremely good thief. He picked pockets, shoplifted, and robbed a few cash registered. He also stole cars for fun, driving them a block or two, park them and wait for the owner's reaction in a hidden position.

Orga was a regular boy until the love of his life, his girlfriend for four years, cheated on him with his best friend. He snapped and had killed his parents. He was smart enough to act innocent when the cops came, but the 10 other people on the block lessened the suspicion on him. He was sent to his uncles, but was kicked out soon after.

Mick was a strange one. He only lost his temper twice. Once was when he was six. His parents were druggies and drunkards; they always beat the boy. One day he had enough, grabbed a knife and done away with them. He faked his kidnapping and ran away. The other time was when he was nine. This cop was trippin' over a shoplifting job Mick completed. He was almost caught in an alley. The cop beat him a few times before memories resurfaced and Mick swiped his gun. The rest is fairly obvious.

Crot was the most dangerous, I believed. At least, he's the one I feared the most. None of the 'gang' members knew what happened to him, but sometimes he'd start laughing randomly or he'd start screaming in terror. All we know is all that something happened and it comes back to haunt him.

A few months later, Mick and I had found we shared a common interest for music (other than stealing) and that was music. Both of us hated the prissy 'punk' now-a-days, though. Even though it sucked and we couldn't relate to it, we would listen to it anyway. We needed music to live, I still do.

"Man!" Mick hollered out, staring at the battery powered radio in my hands. I was ready to chuck it out the window. "This chick waltzes in and completely takes any of the hardly good music away and replaces it with this…this…shit! Less than trash!" Mick was fuming, but luckily held the brunt of his temper. I was angry, too.

"What kind of song is called 'Quiet Night'?" I growled out. Mick grabbed the radio and flung it out the window. We both heard a satisfying crash. "That was the only music source we had, Mick…" I blinked, monotone creeping into my voice.

Chris took one look at our sullen faces and walked over, smiling slightly. I watched him plunk down beside me. "So…broke the radio, Mick?" Mick nodded, not really caring other than it was our only music source. "Lucky for you two that I found this…" He takes out a small blue rectangle with headphones that were the size of his palm. He hands it to me. "It's an extremely old…ancient…piece of technology called an I-pod. Some lady was treasuring it, but never used it so I swiped it. The songs are pretty good."

I pressed the small play button and handed one of the small 'phones' to Mick. He lipped it in and was pleased to hear a loud beat and telling lyrics. "Thanks, Chris!" I smiled up at him. It was like Christmas to us, even though we had never received a good gift in our entire lives.

We passed the day listening to the songs. The I-pod screen showed us what the songs were called and who they were by. Bad Religion, Papa Roach, Godsmack, Thousand Foot Krutch, Linkin Park, Seether, Nickleback, Story Of The Year, etc. There was even the band we listened to that was sung by a powerful voiced lady called Evanescence. The lyrics kept us addicted.

Mick had fallen asleep, using my lap as his pillow. I looked around at the rat nest of rags that Crot and Orga slept on. Orga had slept with him because he was the only one who could even begin to handle Crot's night terrors. I felt tired, too, leaning against the cold wall. I normally slept with Mick on his half-piece of a mattress.

Chris walked over to the two of us. He picked up the blond and motioned for me to follow him. I helped him lay the boy on the rough mattress piece, but he pulled me with him when we were finished. He pulled me down with him on the couch and wrapped the blanket and his arms around my lithe, shivering body to warm me up.

That was when something Crot had said popped back into my mind. _'You're not a member of this gang,'_ he had commented brightly. _'You're more like the leader's lil' brother.'_ I finally understood what he had meant. I was like Chris's little brother, just like Chris was the older brother I never had. It was just that way to the five of us. Orga was Crot's friend and helper, and Mick was the gang clown. Chris was the leader and I his little brother.

As soon as Chris turned 18, we thieved as much as we could so we could bye and keep rent a town house. That was when we were finally going to become more than thieves. We were going to ascend the level of murderers. Chris and I, assuming Crot had killed someone, were the only ones who hadn't killed someone.

"So me, Shani and Crot are the only ones who never done this before…" Chris commented in our heated new home. A shaky smile was on his lips.

Crot lifted his head up. "I have…" His blue eyes were dull, but there was a malicious grin covering his face. We all looked at him in surprise. "My older sister," he said, answering our unspoken question. "At nine I killed my sister and ran away. Coppers thought I was kidnapped. That was in New York." We were in Boston now! "I hitched on a train and ended up here."

"Ok…" Chris mumbled, surprised at the new-found information. "Shani and I, then…" he corrects.

We decided to get revenge on those in Boston. Chris – the Burners, Orga – his ex-girlfriend, and myself – my parents. Crot's family and would-be targets were in New York City and Mick already got his revenge. I was now 12. Mick was 13, Crot was 14, Orga was 17, and Chris was 18 when we got the Burners.

"Hey, Matt…Luna…" Chris mutter out, holding a 45-sistler to the 65 year old man's head. I was holding a 45 AV hand pistol, Orga had a 97 XRP gun, Mick held a knife and Crot held a cleaver. Mick was holding the knife to Luna's throat. As soon as the gun was fired, Mick's knife flashed and he dropped the dead woman to the floor.

A month later, we got Orga's girlfriend AND his best friend. We just let Orga shoot the two of them, lying on her bed after a small sexual workout. He shot the gun 20 times and didn't miss once.

Then my turn came up. I nearly got sick when my mother screamed after I pulled the trigger and shot my father in the neck. I watch Crot come up silently and hack her head off, her lips still shaped in a cry of terror. Chris had went over and shut their eyes like he had done for the four others we finished off. He said that he still held a little compassion.

My parents weren't the only ones killed that night. As we hurried home, we were spotted by a nine-year-old and her older sister. They knew we had killed someone because of the blood splattered on us, especially me. Crot and Mick went after the older one, near 19, with Crot's cleaver. The two were too scared to run or scream and we didn't want extra noise so we didn't use the guns. I was the fastest so I was o kill the girl three years my junior. Mick and Crot were struggling with the lady.

My stomach lurched as I walked numbly over to the girl, silent tears running down my young face. The only reason she had to die that night was because she was at the wrong place at the wrong time. I didn't want to kill her, but that didn't stop me from sliding Mick's knife across her throat deeply. The little action of sin had given me such pleasure that I had never known before. When the girl fell, I turned over to the red-head and blond who were still fighting with the lady. I walked over and Mick and I held her down. When the cleaver snapped through her neck, I was splattered with even more crimson. Mick had been holding her legs. I liked the slick feeling of the blood! That was the day I lost everything; my parents, my innocence and my compassion. I brought the blade to my tongue and licked the blood off.

Mick and I switched weapons that day. I loved slicing people's throats; it gave e pleasure from the blood dripping onto my hands. Mick didn't care which he used. Chris was like me; the blood gave him a shock of pleasure, but, unlike me, he saved a bit of compassion. That was when we started randomly murdering people. In two years our death total was 54. The 55th was our undoing, though.

"That person…" Chris whispered to us. He motioned to a brunette man. We watched him go into an alley and we struck. We let Orga take the kill, shooting the man right in the back of the head. Next thing we knew, 10 cops were upon us. Orga got five of them with precise shots, but a dozen more came. Somebody pushed me toward the ladder of the building beside us; Mick, I believe. I climbed up and ran…all alone.

A week later, I heard that one of them 'died'. I knew he was tortured to death, the cops trying to get information about me. Mick was the one tortured to death. Mick and I were quite alike. We were best friends. His death hurt, but I stayed in hiding. Then, 4 days later, there was another death. My adopted brother was the next victim. I knew that these cops meant business and would kill all of them to capture me. I turned myself in.

The reason we weren't caught earlier was because Earth faced almost all of it's forces to defeat PLANTS; to slaughter all the coordinators off. That brought on our choice. Either we walk Death Row or agree to military experimentation. The three of us, being sentenced as adults, chose the latter in fear of death. Another year later…only I lived.

-------------------------------------------**_Dream Scene End_**------------------------------------------------

I sit up sharply, gasping. I leap up, not caring about the two coordinators hurrying in to see what's gone. I grab my EA uniform roughly, search the pockets until I grab something and collapse onto the bed. I toss the jacket to the floor and breath deeply when I put in the headphones, drowning myself in the sound of 'Three Days Grace', My visible eye is dull. I feel the lady put her hand on my shoulder.

"_I heard that the chick pop singer's name is Lacus Clyne, daughter of ZAFT leader Seigel Clyne," _Mick's long gone voice says softly into my mind. _"Lacus Clyne, daughter of ZAFT leader."_

"_Athrun?" Muruta Azrael had questioned after I told him the name of the red machine pilot's name. He looked up before typing something into his laptop. "I wonder if he's ZAFT leader, Patrick Zala's son…" Later, the pilot who killed Crot proved Azrael's theory correct. He had said 'Back off, Zala!' to the pilot in the final battle. _Than they're…oh my god!

I leap up and dash straight out the door, glad that I had grabbed my shoes before I left and pulled on my jeans before falling asleep. I ran and didn't stop until I was a mile away. Than I collapsed to the ground, panting harshly.

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_**Ok! Done. Sorry for the long wait. This took 3 to 4 hours to type up! WAHHH! T-T**_


	4. Unexpected Meetings

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

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**Chapter 4 – Unexpected Meetings**

I pant softly, resting my head on the wall behind my head in, ironically, a (from the looks of it) unused alley way. It seems so long ago that Chris and Orga had found me in that New York alley way. I was starving and homeless than…much as I am now. But this is a rich PLANT so the likelihood that someone like the gang would find me is slim. My eyes fill up with tears as I think about my friends. They would be so upset that I actually lived under the protection of the descendents of the late two ZAFT leaders. Actually, they would despise me for what I have become…I'm a coordinator now! Sure, the drugs gave us a coordinator-like attack power, speed and reflexes, but we were still just naturals.

"God damnit…" I whisper out, resting my head on top of my thin legs, my hair falling over both eyes. "I wish I were dead…Crot, is this the reason you let yourself die? It hurts…so bad…" I choke out almost silently, my lips barely moving as a faint, almost-missing sound escapes my lips. I punch the ground violently, getting ready to curl up and go to sleep as I did so long ago, kicked out of my home and all alone. "I understand you now…" I cough out, lifting up a shaky hand to wipe the salty liquid from my mismatched eyes.

"Yo!" I glare up at the boy who interrupted my 'pity me' session. He blinks and kneels beside me, watching in interest as I push my body to a sitting position. He looks at me strangely, staring as if he actually recognized me, which should be near impossible. "Shani Andres!" he gasps, awe creeping into his voice. His companions look at me, one blatant while the other tries to hide his curiosity. "Wow! I know you're him! You look identical! It's so cool to meet you here!" the boy chirps, kind of acting like he's my 'biggest fan' or that kind of bull shit.

"…" I look at him carefully. He has sky blue hair, slightly flipped like Crot's but longer and messier, bright aqua eyes, pale skin, and sharp, slightly girlish, features. His thin body is clothed in a teenager's regular black and gray/green garb, leaving little to the imagination. His lips are curved in an awed smirk and his eyes bright with excitement. A chain with a flat pendent, like one of those dog-tag things, is around his neck daintily, contrasting with the dark clothing.

I turn to his taller, more serious companion. The older boy's hair is a lime green, more green than Orga's was. The brightly colored hair is cropped short, spiking up slightly. His amber eyes are sharp and quick, obviously well-sighted. His lips are simply straight, not curved up nor curved down. He wore a normal pair of beige pants and a red/purple shirt underneath a white dress-like long-sleeved shirt.

Then I glance toward the girl of the group, also seeming to be the youngest, as well. Her blond hair is shorter than Lacus's, going to about her shoulder in a wavy style. Her wide, pink eyes are shining brightly in sickening joy as her pink lips are molded into a pleasant, innocent smile. Her skin is fair like the green-haired boy's, not quite as pale as the blue-haired boy's own skin. She wears a purple/blue outlined dress, the full skirt and most of the rest a pure white color mixed with such a light sheen of blue that most people would notice it. She is curved almost perfectly, and even under the covering dress you could tell she had a nice body. Most boys would like her, but I'm not one of them.

"What's it to you?" I mumble out, wary that the three teenagers a year or two younger than me, somewhere in-between 13-15. I'm fifteen, but the tall green-haired boy seems to be as well. I glare at the 14-year-old looking boy coldly. He steps back a little. "Well?" I snap, liking the power that I got from scaring them. With a huff, I turn to glare at the other two, as well. "Is somebody going to answer me?" I growl out.

"S-sorry!" the blue-haired boy stutters. Carefully, he reaches into his pocket, much to the tallest boy's protests, and takes out a small card. He hands it to me and I glance at it, not really caring what it is. The words 'OMNI Enforcer' catch my eyes however. Looking at the card in shock, I read the scant information on it. 'Auel Neider, Extended Pilot for the Earth Alliance.' "Do you understand now? The three of us are a team…" the boy, Neider, says as he motions to the girl and the guy behind him.

"You're extended pilots?" I question softly. Neider nods happily. I hand him back the military personnel card. Leaning back against the brick wall of the alley, I murmur, "Am I supposed dead?" I ask them. The other boy nods slowly. "So…you know who I am. What are you going to do?" My purple eye meets Neider's aqua eyes quickly. He turns away from my sharp gaze, not meeting my eyes. I turn to the other two. "Who the hell are you two, anyway? I know this dork's name is Neider, but I don't know what yours' are," I comment dryly.

The boy holds out his hand to me, which I blatantly ignore. Keeping my eyes on him, I keep sitting against the wall. Huffing slightly, the green-haired boy pulls his hand back, flustered by my rude action. "I'm Sting Oakley. And this is Stellar Lousier. We're also extended…" he mumbles, glaring at me for embarrassing him. "You were an OMNI Enforcer, as well. But why are you in PLANTS? You're a natural…" he whispers. He bends down so he's looking at me face to face, much like Orga used to do when I was annoying him and he wanted to show me he was being serious.

Sighing, I shake my head, sending shock-green locks of hair drifting across my cheeks in the motion, revealing my amber eye in the process, but only for a second. "No…I'm not a natural…not any more. I was turned into a coordinator to save my life when I was being destroyed from the inside by the drug Gamma Glipheptin. I was unconscious so I never had a choice, given one I would have chosen death like my teammate had. But I am not a natural anymore…" I comment softly, keeping my voice low like them since we are in enemy territory. "But what brings three extended pilots for the EA in PLANTS? Doesn't seem like something those higher-up idiots would do. Hmm?" I question them, a sneer crossing my lips at the thought of those 'superior' officers.

Neider seems to have finally shaken himself out of his stupor. "A bit of scouting before a mission that is to initiate next year," he answers. "We're going back to the ship, would you like to come? You're still an EA extended pilot…you'll be welcome aboard the ship…" he murmurs softly. Offering his hand, he is surprised when I grab it.

"That would be nice, Neider. I'm a fighter at heart…" I mumble. Easily pulling me up, Neider loops his arm around me and leads me down the street to a shuttle that will take us to the EA ship hiding just outside the PLANT. Sting smiles at me, saying that I won't regret it. I roll my eyes. "Yeah…and I won't regret being decapitated…" I retort sarcastically.

Stellar giggles, resting her head on my shoulder as we ride the shuttle. "Shani-kun is going to be Stellar's brother now, ok?" Looking into her magenta eyes, I make a 'whatever' sound. Taking it for yes, she smiles. "Shani-niisan?" I blink at her blatant personality. "Does Shani-niisan like Stellar?" Her eyes are so sad I simply nod, getting annoyed at this simpering baby who can't even talk right. "Yay!" she chirps.

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_**Ok! Chapter 4 is done! Sorry about the wait…I have three others…wait…maybe a few more…stories that I am continuing at the moment while a few are on hold. There's only so much a 13-year-old can do! I'll probably be updating more now that Easter Holidays have started. I don't have to worry about school now! It's also kind of tough because every second weekend I go to my dad's house…eh-heh-heh… (Sweat drop).**_


	5. All Aboard

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

**_Gahh! Also...what is the ship that Neo commands? Gahh! I can't remember and I looked it up but couldn't find where they say it! Please tell me! _**

_**There were some worries that this may become a ShaXStel. I can assure you it WON'T!**_

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**Chapter 5 - All Aboard!**

(AN: I always wanted to say that!)

I look down at the slightly smaller boy, Neider. I am only about an inch, give or take, taller than him. His eyes are closed as he dozes, bored to death of waiting for the ship to come into view. Smiling softly, I take a closer look at the boy. His sky blue hair frames his pale young face, contrasting with his skin perfectly. His small lips are molded in a small, innocent smile. His normally vibrant, full-of-emotion aqua eyes are closed, leaving the rest of his face oddly peaceful, the exact opposite of his usual personality. I found out how old the boy is, as well. He's only a year younger than me; 14. The other one, Sting Oakley if I am correct, is 15 like me and the girl, Stellar Lousier, is 14, too.

Speaking of Lousier, she is sleeping using my shoulder as a pillow. Her blond hair is soft against my bare arms, tickling slightly. Her pink eyes are shut and her lips are curved in a bright smile. She's even giddy asleep! God, what have I gotten myself into? Too bad I don't believe in this so-called saint of a god!

"Could you wake her up, Shani?" Sting questions softly, bending over to shake Neider gently. I turn and shake the girl a bit roughly, turning away when she looks up at me and smiles even brighter. "Stellar! The ship's here. We're about to board." He turns to the boy, glaring at the stubbornly sleeping 14-year-old. "Auel! WAKE UP!" he screams into his comrade's ear.

"I had an uncooperative ally…I can wake him…" Sting seems thoroughly glad when offer. He quickly nods, watching silently as I walk over to Neider. Taking out my headphones, I stick one of them into his ear. Turning the volume full-blast, I click play and then stop it, watching as Auel wrenches it out and glares at me angry that I disturbed his sleep. "'Kay…he's up…" I let the smirk cross my lips, not caring that Neider is glaring at me, rubbing his sore ear.

"I see…" Sting comments, rising a thin eyebrow. Shaking his head, he mumbles, "I heard that from here…" He looks back up. "The boarding doors are this way. Follow me…" He starts walking, Auel following silently behind STILL rubbing his ear.

Stellar grabs my arm happily. "Come on, Shani-niisan!" she chirps, making me roll my eyes wearily. I allow the cheerful blond ditz to pull me over to the doors, rolling my eyes again when she tell _me _to be careful. I've been on more of these travel ship-to-ship halls than I can count. I just let her have her fun, though.

We enter the military ship to come face to face with a blond man, masked and wearing black military garb I have never seen before. He stares at me, wondering why his pilots have brought a stranger aboard. "Who is he?" he questions Sting.

Sting looks at him carefully. "Neo, sir, this is Shani Andres. He is one of the first extended pilots, one of the three that were under Azrael's command. We found him in PLANTS and decided to bring him along, he'll probably be useful to you, no?"

'Neo' looks at me carefully. "Very well. I will need to talk to you, Shani. You three are dismissed to do what you wish." The way he speaks, I know he's the commander of this ship. He motions for me to follow him into his quarters. "Please sit down, Shani…" he says pleasantly, pointing to a chair in front of the desk in the room. He walks over and pulls the desk chair away from the desk, pushing it toward the chair I sit down in so we are face to face with nothing in-between us. "You're one of the extended under Azrael's orders?"

"I was, yes…" I answer. He looks at me questioningly. "I made it out of the war alive. I was in a coma and Lacus Clyne and Athrun Zala had taken me in. The drug, Gamma Glipheptin, was killing me so to undo the effects they had me turned into a coordinator. I ran away soon after waking up and your three found me dozing in an alley. Neider recognized me," I explain softly.

Neo nods. "So you are a coordinator now…" he comments, more to himself than to me. I stay silent and still, staring down into my lap. "Sting was right…I can have a use of you. You were an excellent pilot; your power raised by the drug that partially turned you coordinator. You can be assured that Gamma Glipheptin isn't used anymore. There is a way we made that they have a different drug injected into them. They are trained from birth to fight. The drug, when a certain word that is different for each person is said, it will activate and cause them the pain you have felt every time Gamma Glipheptin wore off," he tells me. "You are a coordinator, so your strength is at its peak. Unfortunately, we can not control you like we can them."

I raise my head slightly at his words. "All I want to do is to fight. It's all I can do. I am a criminal that was on death row. I escaped it by running and being experimented on by the EA. I belong to them now, and this ship is part of the OMNI forces. That all meaning I am under your command…" I whisper out. I stare back down at my lap, silent. My eyes are dim with the knowledge that I am at someone's disposal.

Neo nods slightly. "That is true. I can tell you aren't one to betray that. I'll take you to your room…" He stands up and grabs my arm gently; so much different from the last commander I had met. I let him take me to a singles room, letting me walk in. He hands me a uniform and a choice of color shirt. I took orange like my old one. "You can do whatever you wish to the uniforms. Stellar has torn the shoulders off." He smiles and walks out of the room, allowing me to change in peace.

I pull the orange shirt over my tank-top, finding that it is a bit loose. But that suits me just fine. I pull the jacket on, leaving it undone. That had driven Badgiruel nuts! I blatantly glare at the white pants, tossing them aside and keeping my torn jeans on instead. I slip my Ipod into the chest pocket of the uniform. I then carefully slip the soaks off of my feet and pull on the military ones, tossing the filthy soaks where I had tossed the pants. I slip on the clean pair of military boots on, feeling more comfortable than I have in a long time.

Stellar had pulled me to the cafeteria, making certain that I ate something. She then had spent the entire evening showing me around the ship. She showed me where her room and where Sting and Auel's room was. She then let me go back to my room, even though it is nearing 2 am. I swear it's like she doesn't tire!

I sigh and strip off my jacket, boots, and t-shirt. I leave my socks, jeans and tank-top on. Yawning, I run a brush through my thick green hair, untangling the wicked knots I always get. I guess that's what I deserve for having long hair. I set the clothing into a pile, glad that the rooms aren't zero-gravity like the halls and bridge. The cafeteria isn't either. Now that would be amusing to see someone try to eat!

"Shani-niisan?" I glance over to the door, catching sight of the blond and pink whirlwind. She is still for once. "Stellar can't sleep…can Stellar sleep with Shani-niisan?" That speech obstruction is going to drive me crazy! Her pink eyes stare into my own. "Please, Shani-niisan?" She is practically begging.

"I…sure…" I mumble, not quite aware of why I said yes. She smiles and wanders in, her light blue and white nightgown dragging on the ground slightly. She waits for me to crawls on the twin-sized bed before lying down beside me. Almost falling off, she yelps slightly. I wrap my arms around her waist, keeping her on as she falls asleep. 'I have had brothers before, but this is my first sister. And I am older this time…' A slight grin crosses my lips as I fall asleep, thinking of how Chris and Mick would be proud of me for adopting a 'sister' like they had adopted me as a 'brother' and best friend. My eyes drift shut, leaving me in dreams of the gang.

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_**Ok! Chapter 5 is complete! Wo0t! **_

**_Again, what is the ship that Neo commands? I really would like to know! Then I don't have to call it 'the ship' all the time!_**


	6. A Tough Question

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

_**There were some worries that this may become a ShaXStel. I can assure you it WON'T! In the last chapter, the only reason he put his arm around her waist was to keep her on the bed. It's only built for one person and he was lying closer to the wall. I don't think she'd be 'pleased' to fall out of the bed, no?**_

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**Chapter 6 - **

Yawning, I open my eyes slowly. Catching the sight of the girl curled up with her head resting against my shoulder, I sigh softly. Carefully, I remove her arms from their placement around my chest and settle her down on the bed as I gently crawl over her and land on the floor with a near-silent 'thud'. Glancing back as she tosses slightly and pulls the blanket over her shoulders unconsciously, I smile softly. Maybe having a little 'sister' won't be so bad...

I kneel slightly and gather up the clothing I had tossed the night before. I walk into the bathroom, strip down, toss all my clothing into the laundry machine that is placed so handily and turn it on. Stripped completely down, I take a glance in the mirror that is on the wall. Grime covers my face slightly, not to mention almost every part of my body. Sniffing the air around me, I nearly gag. 'How can Stellar even stay around me? The girl must be completely stuffed up!' I then realize that I probably had a shower last when I was still in the Dominion. 'Yuck!'

Quickly, I turn the shower on, grabbing bottles of shampoo, condition and soap from the drawer built into the counter. Of course, they're the military stuff that doesn't have a scent. Growling softly, I shrug. So what? Crot had let me use the herb-like scented shampoo that Azrael let him buy since he was allergic to the military junk. I slip into the shower and let the warm water run down my body as I grab the body soap and a cloth. I quickly start scrubbing my skin raw, finding that it doesn't hurt half as much as it should; must be the coordinator thing. I turn the water up a little, finding that not only does it NOT burn, but it actually feels soothing. After a few minutes, I get the grime and filth off of every part of my body, except for my hair. I grab the shampoo and pour some into my green hair. Running fingers through the strands, I work the soap through every lock of green. When I deemed my hair clean, I let the water wash out the shampoo before doing the same thing with the conditioner.

I then turn the water off and step out of the shower and onto the mat to grab a towel and dry myself off as I toss the now-clean clothing into the dryer. Patiently, I wait for the fast machine to dry the soaked clothing. It took a half hour.

Pulling the warm uniform out, I slip into it. I pull on the black boxers first, then I pull on the tank-top I always have beneath my clothing. I quickly slip the t-shirt over the black material. I do the same with the pants, easily sliding them on over my boxers. I catch my finger through one of the holes that I ripped into it, before grumbling and pulling it out. Simply holding the uniform top, I wander back into my room. I am amazed to see that Stellar is still asleep.

Someone knocks gently on my door. Walking over, I open the door to meet a smiling blue haired boy. "What do you want, Auel?" I ask, careful to keep my voice low enough so Stellar doesn't wake up. I glare at him expectantly.

Auel smirks, catching sight of the girl on my bed. He simply grins up at my, his turquoise eyes glittering with mischief. "Hmm…Stellar's taken to you…" he comments softly, motioning for me to follow him out of the room and where we can talk normally.

Huffing, I follow him out and shut the door behind us. "She keeps calling me 'niisan'," I comment, catching his eyes with my own discolored ones. He chuckles softly. "Does she call you that, too?"

Auel sighs softly, shaking his head. "Actually, she doesn't. Sting and I are just her best friends, I suppose…" he says, leading me out onto the Girty Lue's deck. We're on Earth currently. They landed that night. It was around when Stellar was showing me the hanger, actually. "But that's alright even though she's like a sister to me!" he says, laughing softly. Compared to the Orga, Crot and I, these kids are so much more normal than us. We were the angsty teens who also had homicidal tendencies.

"Is that so?" I say, more as a comment than a question.

Auel presses the button for the deck door. As it opens, we are hit with a blast of salt-water carried on the wind. Auel breaks out into a childish grin and wanders onto the deck. "Wow! It's been a while since I've been traveling over the ocean!" he says, leaning against the railing as the ocean spray hits his face and hair. A soft grin is on his face. "I could just fall in and let her carry me down into her depths…" he says, calling the ocean 'her'. I haven't noticed until now how much he looks like the elements around us. His blue hair matches the sky and his blue-green eyes catch the same glint that the ocean surface does.

"Her?" I question softly.

Auel turns and smiles, albeit sheepishly. "Yeah…the ocean's spirit," he says softly, blushing at being caught being so deep. "Err…Sorry 'bout that," he murmurs, turning back to stare down at the ocean. His aqua eyes look empty as he loses himself in though. Sighing softly, I pull out my Ipod and slip the headphones into my ear, making sure the volume is where it normally is and not as high as I had on it when I woke Auel up. I flip it on and start listening to the old songs.

"Shani?" Pressing pause, I glance over at the boy. Once he is confident that he has my full attention, he looks toward me quietly. "I…what was it like…having a life other than being an asset to the EA?" His question catches me off guard, but I think about it carefully and slowly, wondering just how to answer. I gently sit down on the deck, crossing my legs and placing the Ipod on top of my right leg. Auel watches me with bright azure eyes, dulled with the mention of his life…or lack of. Once he figures out that I am willing to answer, he hurries over and sits down beside me, desperate to know the answer to his question.

"That's a hard question…" I comment finally, keeping my gaze on my lap. Looking up at him, I catch his eyes with my own mismatched ones. "I am not sure if I can explain it, but I will try. It probably won't be that good of an answer…" I murmur. My mind still thinks carefully about his question. "I'm not the best person to ask, but I did have another life…just not one that most would call happy. Probably the worst times I had were from when I was born to when I was 12. My parents kicked me out and I finally found out what 'family' meant. Two boys, one was my comrade Orga, found me 5 days after being sent on my own. They took me to their hangout. Chris, the other boy that had found me, ended up as something like my older brother. There was also the freak, Crot and my best friend Mick. When you actually feel like you belong, life doesn't seem like it could be better…" I say, staring up at the blue sky.

"You have it a lot easier than I did when I was in the military…" I note, looking over at his contemplating expression. He gives me a curious look, wondering what I'm talking about. "When I was first in the EA, I had to deal with the death of my 'brother' and my best friend. They're the reason I turned myself in…I didn't want Crot and Orga to die. I had been free up to then. The next thing I knew, we had a choice of death or military testing. The idiots we were, we chose the latter. Now, I would probably choose death…no…I definitely would…" I say softly, still keeping my gaze on the sky. Brushing some green strands from the right side of my face, where the purple eye is, I continue. "Due to the drugs Crot, Orga and I weren't the same anymore. All our sense of loyalty to the gang and to Chris and Mick's memory just vanished. We were utterly different people, not belonging in the EA and not feeling belonging with each other, either. It was a life of no existence."

"Wow…I…kind of realize that I _do_ have a life. Stellar and Sting are my comrades and friends…my hold to existence…" he murmurs, catching the meaning in my words; that if you have those to care about you and you care about them, then you have a purpose in life. "Thanks…you did a pretty good explanation there, Shani…" A soft smile slips across his lips.

I raise a thin eyebrow, staring at the strange boy who could go from serious to bouncy to depressed to hell-knows-what in less than five seconds. "Really…" I murmur sarcastically. "I'm sure I did…" Again, my voice dripped sarcasm. Shaking my head slightly, I push myself to my feet and leans lightly against the railing like Auel had not long before. Never have I actually just stood out on the deck just watching the waves and getting hit by the salty sea-spray. It...is oddly comfortable, but not what I'd do often, I suppose. I sigh softly and turn away from the ocean. "I'm not that good at explaining, but you did catch that your life ain't horrible, either."

"Yeah…that I did. Thanks for helping me figure that out, Shani…" the small boy whispers. And I CAN say that! He's 1 inch shorter than I am!

"No problem, brat…" I murmur. He scrunches his face at what I called him, but, for once, doesn't press into it.

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_**Ok! Sixth chapter is done! Sorry for not updating for so long, I also have been making videos and putting them on Youtube. If you're curious about my not-so-good AMVs you can look the up. My youtube account is InoBlue!**_


	7. New Surprises

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

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**Chapter 7 – New Surprises**

Sighing heavily, I let the annoying girl pull me much like the first night I came here. Where on Earth does she get her energy? I watch the blond pass doors, leading me somewhere. I believe I know what place it is, but I'm staying silent. We docked a few days ago at the EA base, Josh-A.

"Come on! Hurry, Shani-niisan!" Stellar chirps, still yanking my arm out of its socket in an attempt to get me to hurry. She turns toward me for a second, her pink eyes boring into my purple and amber ones. Her change in demeanor only lasts a second, but I can finally figure out that she has another personality besides the air-head she has so-far showed me. "Come on!" Seems like she's back to being air-headed.

"Yeah, yeah! Sheesh!" I grumble out, my arm starting to feel numb due to her incredibly tight grip on it. Glaring at Stellar, though she doesn't seem to notice, I wrench my arm from her grasp suddenly. She turns to stare at me with large, confused eyes. Glancing up, I glare. I'm slightly ticked-off. "I think it'd be better if I had possession of my arm, Stellar," I mutter coolly. She nods brightly and continues to lead me away at a fast pace.

Gently massaging my forearm, I roll the sleeves up. Mentally, I flinch at the slightly bruising flesh where her fingers had been just shortly earlier. Making sure to keep up with her almost running pace, I regard her carefully. "Where are we going?" I question, feeling unnerved at being in this military base again. This is where I first got tested one; where I saw so many succumb to the same drug that was in my own veins. It…it feels a little haunting…nostalgic in an unwanted way. 'Damn it…I hate this place…' I think, shivering unconsciously as we pass the experimental labs. I nearly gasp when I see a room with a boy a bit younger than Auel in a room that, according to the door, was marked with the drug name _Gamma Glipheptin_.

Widening my eyes, I pause and peer more carefully into the room. The young boy, I'd say about 13 years old, is writhing in pain. His young face is twisted in pure torture. The small form convulses slightly and I mentally reach out to him. I know that feeling well…he's in with-drawl. 'I thought Neo said _Gamma Glipheptin_ wasn't being used anymore…' I silently murmur. I watch as the doctors come in, handing him the offensive red container to the drug. He gulps it up right away. Relief starts to calm his face and he collapses onto his knees. The name on the door said 'Mangala Forus'. That's the boy's name.

"Niisan?"

I look over to see Stellar looking at me with concern in her pink eyes. I shake my head slightly, removing all thoughts about Mangala from my mind. "I…I'm fine, Stellar. Let's get going, 'kay?" I force a bit of a smile onto my lips, my heart reaching out to the boy painfully. I wanted to help him…but what could I do? Nothing. I walk a few steps, pause, and glance back at Mangala. "I feel for you, Mangala Forus…" I whisper, turning away and following Stellar.

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"Oh, you finally made it!" I regard Neo with cold, non-responding eyes. I don't like this guy. "Oh, what's wrong Shani?" he questions in a worried tone. He walks toward me, kneeling slightly so we are face to face. He brushes my hair to the side, looking into both visible eyes.

"You're a lying bastard," I spit out, glaring at him coldly. I raise my hand and, well, pretty-much bitch slap him quickly. He falls back from my sudden violent action, the damned mask keeping the shocked expression hidden, though his mouth is gaping slightly. He quickly gets to his face, keeping his distance from me. Luckily he had sent Stellar to where Sting and Auel are. I don't think she'd just sit after I slapped her idol. "You fucking, lying bastard!" I glare furiously at him. "You told me that _Gamma Glipheptin_ wasn't being used anymore; it is! There's a boy over there that is taking it." I scowl at him as he unconsciously takes a step back. "Did you honestly expect me not to recognize the symptoms? Tell me the damned truth or I will kill you! I don't care what happens to myself, remember?" My lips curve in a malicious grin.

"That boy has been there for almost half a year. It isn't currently being used; only on him. He's the only one, other than you, who has held on this long. He is going to die; there's nothing we can do for Mangala. Are you still going to kill me?" Neo questions, watching me from behind the mask.

I relax slightly. Carefully watching him, I let my face be covered by a mental mask, showing no emotion. "Do you swear before every God you believe in that you are telling the truth?" He'll answer truthfully, I can tell.

"Yes, _Gamma Glipheptin_ isn't used anymore…" he whispers. He kneels again and envelopes me into a parenting hug that I have never felt in my life before. I unconsciously relax fully, resting in the gentle hug. "It must hurt not being able to save him from a fate you know too well, Shani…" he murmurs into my ear.

"Y-you're a damned bastard, Commander Roanoke…" I choke out, removing myself from the man's arms with a huff. "I won't harm you…and you have my utter cooperation as long as you tell me the truth and keep _Gamma Glipheptin_ extinct." I watch the man nod and motion for me to follow him. "What do you want with me anyway, Commander?" I question, actually treating him with respect unlike Azrael-baka (idiot). I did the same with Captain Badgiruel. She was an amazing woman who deserves respect while the baka doesn't even deserve the bad clothing he wore. Though don't get me wrong, I still don't like Roanoke.

"I wanted to give you something that I am sure you'll like…" he says mysteriously. Neo leads me away from the sight of the worried Phantom Pain team (they _did _see my outburst) and down a hall in the deep center of the Josh-A base. "Look…"

I ignore the hand on my shoulder and look to where he is pointing towards. A soft gasp slips past my lips at the machine in front of us. "I-It's a mobile suit…" I whisper out, not believing my eyes. The machine is an emerald green covered with dark green armor. The phase shift is activated and the eyes of the Gundam glow gold. My breath catches in my throat. It has a similar build to the GAT-X252 Forbidden, but more lithe giving it an obvious agility to it. It's anti-laser shields are energy themselves, activated through two progecter-like machines position where the shields were on Forbidden. A scythe is attached to the back, also upgraded so it has a laser blade instead of a steel one. A laser gun is visible in the MS's hand, ready for use. There's a holster-like piece of metal on the waist to store it when it isn't being used. "Y-you're giving this to me?" I whisper.

He nods and pushes me toward the machine, lowering the mechanic elevated lift for me to go on. "Check it out. We'll let you practice with it tomorrow. We're still in peace, but only for about half a year. Than war starts again…" When I don't move, he gives me another shove. I walk onto the lift and he raises it.

Opening the hatch, I step into the cockpit and sit down onto the seat. I quickly, with a coordinator's speed, mentally check the controls, figuring what they'll do in record time. I don't turn the machine on, but I mentally play the controls out in my mind. It is a mobile suit…not one of the cruddy mobile armor things Crot, Orga and I used before. I don't think even an extended pilot could use this. When did they make this and why? "This thing is amazing…" I mutter, looking forward for the next year when I can use it in battle.

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_**Geh! Kind of short, but there you go. The next chapter is probably going to be the next half-year going quickly, like showing certain moments and then, what everyone seems to be waiting for, the war will start. Ok?**_


	8. Brats

**Forbidden In Life**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny).**_

_**Author's Notes: Nobody gives Shani the love he really deserves. So this fanfiction is all about him, starting from how he miraculously survived the supposedly fatal attack Yzak landed on him. Story begins around episode 49.**_

_**This is rather sad! I had been updating this chapter on my dad's computer, but I forgot to send it to my email so I could finish it at my mom's (I'm there most of the time) and now my dad went to Manitoba (I'm from Saskatchewan) for the weekend so I have to re-do it all to update; I want to update and I'm sure nobody wants me to wait another week for this. It's all rather embarrassing that my air-headedness (1) caused this all. I am sorry for the long wait, but I hope you like it!**_

_**(1) – It is actually a word…my spell-check let it go…I would have never even imagined that being proper…XD**_

_**Also, sorry for screwing up on Stellar's eye-color….they look like a dark pink to me… (Sweat drop) Maybe I'm color-blind to a small extent?**_

_**Oh! And about the phase-shift…I know the crap-tastic English version and that's what they call it. It's what I know. So if you don't mind, I believe I may continue using it. Sorry if it bothers anyone, but I am English and so I know that stupid translated version that says Phase-Shift. And one tends to use the one they are accustomed to and that is just what I'll do. Sorry if it bothers you! T-T**_

_**God…long comments! Well…here's the story! XP**_

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**Chapter 8 – Brats**

A soft sigh slips past my lips as I attempt to ignore the frequent glances the boy gives me. It's tough…he's doing it just so damned often that it's really starting to grate on my nerves. My hand moves over my Ipod, pausing. While I think of what I should do, my hand drifts over the ancient piece of technology in an indecisive manner. Again, the feeling of being watched hits me straight in the back and I bite back on my annoyance. I sit up from my rather comfortable position of lying on the deck of the ship getting hit with ocean spray, an annoyed look in my eyes as a hand rests on the side of my face in exasperation.

"Sting…" I ground out, turning to look at the green-haired boy with a _tinge_ of irritation in my voice. I push myself to my feet and wander over to where he is leaning against the ship's railing. "If you're going to keep staring at me, at least make it a little inconspicuous, would you?" I mutter, watching him carefully. "A brain-fried natural could feel it, let alone a coordinator who used to be a specialized natural, dumb-ass…" I inform him, carrying the usual '_sweetness_' in my voice. More like utterly insulting everyone around me.

"Urg!"

Sting looks fairly surprised that I figured him out, for reasons unknown to myself. Slowly, a look of understanding crosses my expression. "Oh yeah, you normally have to deal with a brain-fried baka and a clueless blond…" I murmur, a smirk crossing my lips. A cruel, teasing grin tugs at my lips as I think of my next teasing comment. "And I'm sure you thought I wouldn't notice since you can stare dreamily at Baka all you want without that brain-fried moron even blinking at it…" I retort snidely, enjoying the look of utter disgust and annoyance that suddenly became evident in his gold eyes.

"NO WAY IN HELL!" he splutters. I snigger softly as he glares daggers at me for even suggesting such a thing. Slowly, his disgust-fuddled mind, which had been obscured by the immediate reacting, realizes that I was relentlessly teasing him. His cheeks flush lightly in embarrassment at being so easily pulled into my little scheme, though I had learned how to do just that with another quick-witted guy. That's right; I'd tease Orga like that. Fuddle his mind with emotion so he completely open and rendered unable to figure out my intentions with my words; whether I am teasing or if I am stating facts I personally believe. "Y-you-"

"Oh, by the way," I interrupt, grinning at the glare he gives me. I gently remove the headphones of my Ipod at regard him with an intrigued look. Subconsciously, he takes a step back. Slowly, my interested look turns to aggravation. "Why the hell _were _you staring at me? What the hell do you want?" I ground out.

"I-" His nervousness vanishes behind the mask he mentally wears and he meets my eyes slowly. "I wanted to know why you hit the commander yesterday."

My eyes widen slightly. I didn't know that they saw…I would have thought Stellar would have hurried over to defend her _precious _Roanoke. "I…you saw that?" I question softly, not knowing what his reaction would be. When he nods, his eyes don't hold any resentment. No, actually, they show genuine curiosity. Seems that Sting doesn't like the Commander much, either. "He told me a half-truth, I thought he lied, and I don't take well to liars…" I summarize lamely. "We see eye to eye now…so it isn't much of a problem…" I grunt out indifferently.

"I…see," Sting says, regarding me carefully with gold eyes. "I'm glad…" he murmurs whisper-soft.

"Hmm?" I look up at him. Damned bastard. I hate it when I am forced to accept that I am, indeed, small.

"I…" He blushes lightly, seemingly embarrassed at what he's about to say. My eyes show a hint of curiosity. Sting looks down at me, mentally swallowing the pride he still has intact. I'll finish that off later… (AN: XD) "I'm glad that you and Roanoke are on even grounds…or at least as even as they could be. That way you won't be thrown out to die. I…we; Stellar, Auel and I, don't mind you. Even if you can be a real bastard at times…" he says, directing the last with a glare.

I blink slowly, not really seeing the embarrassment behind his words. Slowly, a snide grin crosses my lips as I think about his last sentence. "Touchy…" I mutter. I smirk at him, for once not caring that I am shorter. I have him completely flustered. I rather miss the challenge Orga held up; these kids are way too easy…

Sting stiffens slightly. "B-bastard!" he squeaks out as I simply wave snidely. I smirk and meet his eyes with an utter arrogance in my gaze, watching him bite down on his lip in anger and annoyance. "Jerk…" he growls out as the door shuts behind me; a barrier separating me from my prey. I'll let him off easy…for now.

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_**(AN: Finally I put an interaction between Sting and Shani. Sorry if Sting seems OOC, but I hear that the annoyingly sardonic people can bring that out in people. Frankly, I would have said a lot that Shani did. My best friend actually calls me sardonic…XD Ah well…I know I'm loved! XD And for a sardonic, homicidal druggie…Shani sure seems loved, as well. I heard it's because of the scythe… (From some druggie fan-listing out there))**_

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A soft knocking comes from outside of my door and I glare sleepily at it. "What?" I question shortly, disgruntled that my sleep is being disturbed. If that's Stellar, I will kill her. I kicked her out half a week ago so I can actually get some sleep. You see, she developed a very annoying habit.

"Can I come in, Shani?" Auel questions. When I grumble colorfully, he presses in the code anyway. I glare at the blue-haired boy. "I'm sorry for barging in! Yeesh!" he protests softly, giving me a pleading look the next second. "Could I sleep here for awhile?" His aqua eyes shine with pure begging in them.

"Why?" is all I say to that. I regard him coolly; mentally wondering why these kids seem to not want to let me sleep. They should know that most teenagers get rather grumpy if their sleep is disturbed; myself included.

"Stellar's taken to sleeping in me an' Sting's room…" he says softly, while my eyes soften with understanding. As I was saying before he came in, Stellar developed a bit of an annoying habit. She talks in her sleep. Loudly.

"I see…" I murmur. Groaning softly, I glare at him. "If you can keep quiet, you can sleep on that bed…" I mutter, motioning toward the second bed in the room. Most of the rooms here have two beds in them. A relieved smile crosses his lips as he goes to thank me. "But!" I quickly say before he can even get the 'th' out. He quickly halts, not sure of what I am about to say. "Like I said before; if you can't keep quiet, you're gonna be outta here faster than Stellar's eyes light up when she sees the Commander, got it?" I say, glaring up at him. I'm sitting on my bed, remember.

"Y-yes!" Auel sputters out. I can see the flash of worry mix into the bright azure orbs. He bows slightly; stiffly. "Thank you, Shani…" he murmurs as he crawls into the bed afore-mentioned.

Looking over at the boy curling himself in the covers, I hide a smile. I really am the older brother to these kids; the one who has lived in the world while they know absolutely nothing about it. "Whatever…" I murmur, keeping up my rough personality. I…I think I'm starting to soften up on these little brats. "Is…is this what you felt when you took care of me…Chris-niisan…" I whisper into the silence. Auel has already fallen asleep. "…I miss you…Mick, Dumb-ass **(1)**, and Orga, as well…"

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"Shani-niisan?"

Glaring at the girl, I give her a slightly perturbed look. I press pause on my Ipod and remove the head-phones. "What?" I question slowly. I give her a sharp look as I sip on the coffee I had recently ordered. I lean on the railing of the ship; the pole digging into the small of my back comfortably. (AN: Can that be in any way, shape or form comfortable?)

"Stellar saw Shani-niisan practicing with the S4T-7P05 Tragedy…" she starts, a bubbly smile on her lips. She turns her purple (AN: I remembered! WoOt!) eyes toward my face. "Shani-niisan is amazing!" she chirps happily, stealing a sip of my coffee and humming happily. I put a teaspoon of sugar and some cream in it. I don't exactly like the taste of black coffee…too strong for my liking. Seems like she thinks the same, seeing as she doesn't return it.

"Stellar…" I ground out, rubbing my temples as I start to feel a headache coming on. "I'd like that back…" I say, closing my eyes as she quite clearly refuses to give it to me. Actually, when I open my eyes she actually has the nerve to stick her tongue out at me. "Stellar…" I warn softly, putting my Ipod into my pocket. "Give it back."

"NOPE!" With that, she takes off toward the door to the bridge. Luckily it was a traveling mug or there wouldn't be any left.

"STELLAR!" I curse and run after her, ignoring the amused looks of the other two extended pilots. Ok…I take everything back about these kids growing on me. As soon as I catch up to her, she is going down! And then I'll come back to wipe those smirks off of Baka and Sting's faces!

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_**LaZ: Awe…they love you too, Shani! LOL. Oh well…it was going well at the start…**_

_**(1) – For anybody who didn't figure it out, Shani refers to Crot as 'Dumb-ass' just as he calls Auel 'Baka'. It's his 'affectionate' terms for them.**_

_**You better like this! XD! It took me SO long to finish…then again, I am also listening to music and reading fan-fictions, so perhaps that's my own fault… (Sweat drop) I feel like I'm getting old! I had three cups of coffee while typing this up…**_

_**LaZ: Shani **_**acts **_**all 'I don't care', but he's just a big softy underneath! **_

_**Shani: WHAT?**_

_**LaZ: It's true!**_

_**Shani: (Pull out gun) Wanna repeat that? (Sickly sweat voice)**_

_**LaZ: Umm…you know what? I don't really think I do…**_

_**Shani: Though as such. And if you ever go spouting out that nonsense I **_**will **_**kill you. Remember that!**_

_**LaZ: Umm…yes sir… (Pout) **_

_**LaZ: (Cough) Bitch (cough)**_

_**Shani: What was that? (Obviously fake sweetness)**_

_**LaZ: I didn't say a thing. (Sweet smile)**_

_**Shani: Maybe I should kill you…**_

_**LaZ: PLEASE REVIEW! Preferably BEFORE I drive Shani to the brinks of his already insanity… **_


End file.
